We spent the night hanging out with Kathleen and Aaron, eating hummus at the kitchen table, catching up. The next day was crazy. My amazing bridesmaids got my car washed while Nate and I ran last minute errands. I packed for my honeymoon almost all day -which was surreal - knowing I wouldn't be back in my apartment for over 10 days, at which time I would have experienced both my wedding and hawaiian honeymoon. I went to lunch with Emily and Kathleen - two of my greatest friends from NY and bridesmaids. I had missed them SO MUCH and to have them here in California was a dream. Then after a bit of scrabbling between bridesmaids, all our luggage and wedding decor, and a bunch of helpful, beers-in-hand groomsmen, we were off to Orange County for my bachelorette party.
We met up with Kate and Lisal and the 5 of us headed to Javier's in Newport Beach for the festivities. I can confidently say my bachelorette party was THE GREATEST NIGHT EVER. We talked and laughed and drank and danced until about 1:30am. My friends from all over, with different backgrounds and personalities formed this incredible group that was all happy and excited to be there. It could not have been more fun and reminded me of how lucky I am to have such incredible friends.
The next day was filled with more last minute errands, hair removal (what can I say, its my curse in life), putting together remaining favors, and taking an inventory of the massive amount of decor we had collected over the past 6 months. Again, my bridesmaids were a dream. I could not have done it without their help - Kathleen bribing my little brother to get his hair cut, included!
Before we knew it, it was the rehearsal - another surreal experience. Hearing the ukulele player for the first time really made things sink in. This vision I'd had for months, heck years!, had come together. The rehearsal was then met with the rehearsal dinner and before we knew it we were back at our hotel.
I bought champagne, and wanting pink champagne that I saw on Pintrest lead me to buy these hibiscus flowers covered in syrup which are supposed to turn your drink pink and give it flavor. Well, everyone thought they were absolutely appalling and wouldn't go close to them. We had a good laugh then watched the Lilly & Marshall's wedding episode of How I Met Your Mother - which I'd been wanting to watch for weeks. It was perfect. I stayed up late trying to articulate my thoughts into a letter to Nate. Lisal came in my room late that night, sad that we'd never have another sleepover - even though she'd been married herself for almost 3 years. It was a bittersweet night. If the three days before our wedding showed us anything, it's that our friends who were part of our wedding will be friends for life.
The next morning I woke up at 7am, got dressed, and went down to the gym to practice yoga. Which by the way, is the only thing that gave me sanity in the weeks leading up the wedding, it was definitely in the plans for how I would begin the morning of my wedding. I spent the majority of my practice breathing deeply in child's pose because moving through poses was just too much.
Then my bridesmaids and I all had breakfast together downstairs in the hotel. We ran into my grandpa who gave me his usual advice "Be Happy". He's a wise man.
We left the hotel and soon realized the weather was less than ideal, but I wasn't worried - it would burn off - it's California! This was reinforced by the 10343098 people telling me not to worry that the sun would be out before I knew it (they lied). I've learned that people tell the bride what she wants to hear.
We all got ready at my parents house, I finished my letter to Nate, gave my bridesmaids their gifts, and then headed to the venue. We were met by our photographer - who is a dream photographer. Amazingly talented, and even more amazing to work with. We drank champagne and I put on my dress and shoes. Pumpkin was there. We got our flowers delivered up to the bridal suite. Nate and his groomsmen were 45 minutes late to the venue. Then when my mom went to deliver my gift and letter to Nate she came back and said "He forgot it in his underwear drawer". I'd listened to my mom say not so funny jokes all morning and assumed this was one of them so I promptly said "shut up". She wasn't kidding. Nate may be a lot of wonderful things, but responsible is not one of them. Luckily, he didn't forget my letter, which was the most important part. I have since received this gift - it's awesome. Even blog-post worthy and now has a special back-story..More on that later.
We took pictures, and spent an exciting, anxious, and peaceful hour up in the bridal suite. I had decided a few days prior while going through wedding readings that I connected much more to eastern religious thought than western, but felt limited when I tried to incorporate this part of myself into our ceremony. I don't think our conservative catholic families would have been okay with Sanskrit chanting. Hoping that my bridesmaids were a little more open to the idea, I decided to lead a pre-ceremony Om Chant in the Bridal Suite. I found a nice article demystifying the word Om and right before walking down the isle that's exactly what we all did. It was beautiful. Peaceful. Perfect.
Then I met my dad and we listened as each member of our bridal party walked down the isle. I was so ready to go. I was so ready to marry Nate. The venue helper lead us a different way that what we'd rehearsed so everyone thought I had tripped down the stairs or fled last minute, but I hadn't.
Standing at the end of the isle with my Dad was everything I'd imagined it to be. Nate was exactly how I'd imagined him, except there were people everywhere. I'm trying hard to remember exactly how I felt in that moment, but I think the moment was all so overwhelming my memory of it isn't clear. It was so hard to take it all in. I remember holding back my Dad's arm so he would walk slower so I could try to savor every last moment of the walk down the isle. I was so glad to see Nate at the end of the isle - to do this - to finally marry him.
In the days preceding our wedding I couldn't help but feel as though I was about to receive a gift - my husband. A husband. What an incredible gift. I kept thinking "of all the things I'll have in life, I'm most excited to have a husband". By the way, that feeling has only intensified since our wedding day.
Our ceremony was just what I wanted it to be. It wasn't perfect - but it was perfectly us - perfectly real and the most meaningful part of our wedding day- the part I'd dreamed of most. The officiant dropped my ring, there was a split-second scrabble, and before it could hit the floor I caught it! It was awesome. Listening to our dear friend Val sing, and Kate read about love both about sent me over the edge. Listening to Nate say his vows was the hardest, I could barely hold it together.
Our vows were my favorite part of the whole day. Also, listening to our officiant talk about the Corinthians reading, which Nate's Best Man, Tebbs read. And how time and time again we should come back to it throughout our marriage, and check in, and make sure we're living what the passage says. I love that.
After the ceremony we met with all of our bridal party, gave hugs, and a huge sigh of relief that the most intense part of our day was over and the rest was food and partying. We took pictures, then Nate and I took off with the photographer and videographer to take pictures at Los Rios District - it was beautiful. It was a quiet, peaceful, misty fall day. I was fine with the mist. It was cozy.
Then we had our grand entrance. My dad, Martone and Lisal all gave beautiful speeches. We sat at our very regal sweetheart table and I ate for the first time in 3 days! 1 bread roll and I was full - my stomach had definitely shrunk. Dinner was lovely, I loved that I could sit with just my husband and eat - definitely a good decision we made. The slideshow, which my maid of honor, Lisal made was lovely. Then just as everyone was finishing dessert, the misting turned into sprinkles - light sprinkles. But sprinkles non the less. Somehow I wasn't bothered. I had just married the love of my life and the rain would go away. We met with guests under the archways as we ate creme brulee.
Then the wedding coordinator and everyone working the venue decided it would be best to move inside. This was a bummer - since I'd dreamed of dancing under the stars. It still saddens me a little that the rain forced us inside, but you can't control the weather.
Because of the setup, the DJ had to stay outside while we were all inside. This unfortunately caused us to barely hear the music at first. Nate and my first dance wasn't exactly as planned. We couldn't hear the music, so he sang our song to me. Of course, no one knew this but us. I just kept thinking "how upset can I be? I just married the love of my life". I think we were somehow high off our ceremony, off the fact that we'd just married each other, so much that were were left unaffected by everything else going on. I hope throughout our lives together Nate continues to sing to me when the music goes away.
Shortly after that, a giant speaker was brought inside and the party had begun. I remember thinking I was not going to let the rain ruin our wedding and it was somehow my responsibility to get the party started. I think that was when Nate and I lost all inhibitions on the dance floor to encourage people to join. They did. It was awesome.
We danced, a lot. We cut our cake. We had an anniversary dance in which the longest married couple were left on the dance floor - I gave my bouquet to my lovely grandma. And by 9:30 everyone was exhausted. We'd planned to go till 10:30, at least, but when it came down to it we were just too tired- all of us, our families and our friends. In fact, so exhausted that I made the very tough call not to go to the In and Out after party we'd planned. All I wanted was to get to our hotel.
We had our grand exit with sparklers and took off. The moment the door of our car closed it felt good. I was alone with my husband and we were about to spend the next 8 days on vacation with no worries or stress. What a treat.
In the weeks after our wedding I try to remember it all, but large parts are just a blur. I sometimes feel like I got ripped off and I wish I could go back and experience it all again more consciously. I'm told that I'm not alone in this feeling. I tried so hard to slow down, to Om Chant, to soak it all in but in the end it just flew by. I'm looking forward to regaining my hold on the day through our photography and wedding video which we'll get in a few weeks. But at the end of the planning, I walk away from it all with my husband. Which is by far, the greatest gift I could ever ask for.
Being married is good. When you're committed for life fights end much quicker, there's more respect on both sides, we are finally a family. I'm so proud to be Nate's wife. And I'm so blessed to have him as my husband.
Being married is good. When you're committed for life fights end much quicker, there's more respect on both sides, we are finally a family. I'm so proud to be Nate's wife. And I'm so blessed to have him as my husband.
More on our honeymoon coming soon!
